FD 3

Lora Cheng
Nov. 16, 2009
ENG 215
RD3

Honesty Can Be Twisted Into White Lies

As we all grew up, we were told by our parents to go to bed early or the boogie man will eat us. We were also told when kids lose a tooth the tooth fairy will give them money for their tooth if they put it under their pillow before going to sleep. As you got older you understood the fact that your parents say that is to scare you and make sure you get the amount of sleep you need and get you to do what needs to be done. Parents lie for a good purpose even if their lie is unbelievable to the adult but as we know kids will believe almost anything. [THESIS] Honesty in our roles as tomorrow’s parents and leaders are important in kids’ life but we go around the guidelines to make sure kids follows our rules and does what is needed to be done. [THESIS]

The lies that parents think are good for kids and will make them do what the parents want affects them in great ways. As they get older they will live in the world thinking they have to go to sleep early or a boogie man will pop out of their closet to eat them. Kids are gullible so they will believe that boogie mans exist and they end up having nightmares. Parents need to tell their kids the truth of why going to sleep is important then telling them a lie that will scare them to doing what they want. Certain times the kid is smart enough to figure out that their parent has lied to them and they think it is okay to lie too. So, kids will start lying to their parents about making a mess or blame on others for something they did.

According to the article “The Truth about a Child's Compulsive Lying”, children do lie and parents know that for a fact. Children will lie because of many reasons they are in fear of their parents or it has become part of their personality. They won’t just be lying to their parents but also to their friends and maybe even their teachers. The major thing why kids lie is because of fear which they break something and they are afraid if they tell their parents the truth they will get in big trouble such as grounded or simply being yelled at. Kids are afraid of their punishment so they use the lie to hide it.

By nature everyone lies, it doesn’t matter what age, gender, or race you are. According to the article “Why people lie – and how to tell if they are” has said that “It may only be “white” lies, but everyone tells lies or “omits the truth” sometimes. We start lying at around age 4 to 5 when children gain an awareness of the use and power of language. This first lying is not malicious, but rather to find out, or test, what can manipulated in a child’s environment.” That statement proves that white lies are to avoid telling the truth you go around the boundaries of telling a lie even if it’s half of the truth it’s still considered lying. The environment kids grow up in will affect how they act.

When I grew up I was scared of my parents because I once told them the truth and I got spankings or hit with those feather wooden sticks. I learned my lesson that day not to make the same mistake. So, when I had done something wrong I would have to lie to my parents to get out of being hit because I know it was very painful. I was in fear of my parents because I didn’t want to deal with the consequence.

In the article “Children: lying and honesty”, there were good points because they gave a list of how to deal with children that are dishonest such a “1) Family Values 2) Role Modeling 3)Teach White Lies 4) Teach Fantasy and Reality 5) Reward Honesty 6) Ask Before You Take 7) Problem Solving 8) Older Children.” With these 7 significant points to teach children about being honest it will help children understand and learn why we need to be honest. For example, 5) Reward Honesty, every child loves to have rewards because kids do things for a treat so if you teach them to tell the truth during their hard times you can reward them with a candy treat. This is a great way of teaching kids how to be honest with adults and others.

As one of our classmates Mary Jane Maluyo states our laulima discussion “WHITE LIE - Telling a best friend that his girlfriend is a cheat and a lie might be a very difficult thing to do especially after meeting her for the first time. Many things can occur such as your best friend not believing you. But I do feel that it is not ok if one should lie about how they really feel even if it might hurt the other person. If the best friend still does not believe, at least he/she was honest with him in the first place.” I totally agree with her because it is a true fact. When your best friend ask you about that person you have decided to give a white lie to tell him she is great even if you truly know she isn’t. It takes time to actually have the courage to tell your friend the truth. The white lie covers up what you will hurt your friends feelings. On occasions that what we call a white lie is acceptable to not hurt someone you truly care for.

In conclusion, honesty is important for parents to teach their kids as they are growing up because kids will adapt that world when they get older. They will have to tell the truth in real life once they start going to high school or college. When the parents tell the kids the truth of why they want them to sleep early instead of making up a scary boogie man story to make them go to sleep will help the kids better about themselves. As kids grow up they will understand the meaning of being honest and how a white lie sometimes are okay to keep their friends feelings from being hurt.


Froeses, Michelle. “Children: lying and honesty.” 25 July 2009. Retrieved 9 November 2009 [http://www.webcitation.org/5iXI6Wf5d]

Maluyo, Mary Jane. “Discussion #2 Honesty.” Online posting. 6 November 2009. Laulima Discussion. 9 November 2009 [https://laulima.hawaii.edu].

Quek, Timothy. "The Truth about a Child's Compulsive Lying." Dr. Timothy K. Quek's Webpage. 8 Apr. 2003 Retrieved 9 Nov. 2009 [http://webhome.idirect.com/~readon/lies.html].

Saltz, Gail “Why people lie – and how to tell if they are” msnbc.com 25 July 2009. Retrieved 9 November 2009 [http://www.webcitation.org/5iXGovM5u]


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